I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He passed out mid-signature
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Randomize
