Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
