This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
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