I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
