He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
