that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize