Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i permit you to call me
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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