The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
