My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
