you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize