the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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