She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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