drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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