I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize