You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Randomize
