I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
