Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
