why didn't you poke me back
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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