I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm at about main and main street
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
