my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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