dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize