Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
