i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize