I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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