I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
