there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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