We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize