I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
