Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
