Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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