I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
