yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize