During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
