I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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