Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
