if you like me you must not know who I am
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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