WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
