sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize