remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
