sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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