Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just saw a hot homeless man
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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