Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
