Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
