Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
