My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
