brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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