a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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