if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
