Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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