So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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